


Woke Up New

by conceptofzero



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-11
Updated: 2014-01-11
Packaged: 2018-01-08 08:23:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1130430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptofzero/pseuds/conceptofzero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snowman wakes up, which is very strange because last time she checked, she was dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Woke Up New

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Megan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megan/gifts).



Snowman wakes up, which is very strange because last time she checked, she was dead. When she manages to wake up enough to have thoughts other than ‘but the universe ended with me’, she realizes that perhaps she may have prefered to die because a great deal of her body is missing. It’s been replaced with some rather impressive robotics, but no matter how grand they might be, they don’t change the fact that she is missing both legs, an arm and part of her face. If Slick were still alive, she’s sure he would find some humor in the fact that she’s now missing the same arm she once tore off his body with her whip. 

The first two days she’s awake and adjusting to the odd sensations that come with having a partially robotic body, she’s forced to suffer through the tedious and rather insulting ramblings of some orange and altogether offputting fellow wearing a knock-off Felt suit and an distressing amount of grey paint. And then of course there are the very obvious fake horns he wears on his head, attached to a headband. He attempts to feed her milk from his four-legged butler and that goes over about as well as any thinking being would expect them to. 

She attempts to speak with him a few times, finding his coddling mannerisms and his convoluted way of speaking to be infuriating. More than once, he tells her that this isn’t how things were meant to happen and then starts talking on and on about Slick. When he doesn’t stop the first time she requests he does, she waits until he’s within striking range and gives him a hard punch to the gut. When that doesn’t work, she gives him another placed higher up, and cracks open a rib. That’s the end of him talking about Slick, but not the end of trying to shove a rubber nipple into her mouth. 

On the third day, she unplugs herself from the machines and seeks out some clothes that aren’t this ill-fitting hospital gown. The annoying soft man follows her and demands she return to her bed, but he’s easily quieted with a few sharp words and one strong hand around his neck. Snowman informs him that he will stay out of her way and in return, he will continue to breath through his mouth and not a hole in his throat. Her point is made without any further drawing of blood and he retires to reapply his smeared make-up as Snowman limps her way through the blue halls of this strange and sterile mansion. 

It’s on her walk that she encounters the kitchen, and the short Prospitian cooking over a stove. Whatever she’s cooking smells delicious and she says as much, though in a fairly guarded tone of voice. The Prospitian turns around, her eyes going wide and a hand covering her mouth as she sees Snowman. When the flurry of shock slips off the small woman’s face, she introduces herself as Ms Paint, offers Snowman a bowl of licorice whip soup, and then politely requests Snowman sit down before she hurts herself. 

Snowman is not in the habit of obeying orders from anyone other than Doc Scratch, but since he and everyone else is dead and Ms Paint is polite, she agrees to take a seat and try the soup. In return, she requests she be given something to wear that’s not quite so skimpy. Ms Paint notes that Snowman looks rather fetching in her gown, especially since it’s on the revealing side of things. Snowman asks Ms Paint if she likes what she is. The faint blush under Ms Paint’s shell makes it clear that yes, she rather does. 

By the time Lord English arrives with his gold-plated machine gun and vengeance twinkling in his whirring pool ball eyes, Snowman and Ms Paint are long gone, accompanied by a newly resurrected Felt and wearing matching starry green dresses. Only Andrew is there to greet him with an empty revolver and what’s left of Ms Paint’s soup. 

That also goes over as well as one would expect it to.


End file.
